• The first person who needs to know about your decision is obviously your spouse. If you both sit down jointly and decide on the divorce, it’s a separate issue, but otherwise you have to tell your partner. If you love someone else, tell that too, as it will help to avoid a lot of unnecessary grief, jealousy, and anger in the near future. Besides, it is always better if you could cooperate with each other to get it over with.
• If you have children, you have to break the news to them. They have already noticed that things are not as they ought to be, and you owe them an explanation. Many couples prefer to keep the children in the dark till the last moment. Counsellors generally agree that this is not such a good idea; it only increases the shock effect, and reactions are much more violent this way. You also have to let them meet your present partner if they are to stay with you.
• Family is still a consideration for many when it comes to divorce. Let your parents and siblings know that you are about to split. This is important not just because of social reasons, but also legally. There is the tricky question of inheritance which needs to be sorted out, especially if it concerns ancestral property. These issues ideally need to be clear before you file for divorce, otherwise you might just be taking the first step towards a long, bitter and costly court
  case.
• Telling friends is a decision that will depend entirely on your situation. If your friends are no good busybodies, just leave them alone till they lose interest in you and find a new topic for gossip. On the other hand, they might be an invaluable source of support in every possible way.

The Work Front It has been suggested by most therapists that giving up work altogether can be harmful for divorcees. Most advisors recommend working as a potent therapy method for overcoming the shock. At the same time, the office should not be an escape route. Do not take out your anger on your juniors. And do not clog your mind conveniently to block the self-analysis that is an integral part of divorce. The Financial Front Divorce has its impact on personal finances always. This is the most disputed area in the UK, after child custody. The more the two of you agree on financial matters beforehand the better. If you are decided as to how you will dispose of the property and monies, then draw up an agreement accordingly, as it will simplify the whole process and cut down costs. The question of maintenance payment must be worked out between you and your spouse before you decide to buy a DIY pack or go for a lawyer.

James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. For more information on getting a Divorce see http://www.quickie-divorce.com